The Blog Read by Nobody: Top 30 Roller Coasters

Why 30? Well, because I've been on 30 roller coasters total in my life thus far! It was pretty convenient that it ended up being a nice even number, not to mention 30 isn't really that many to talk about in one post so I don't mind writing about them all. I'm going to write about the rides and then even provide my own little score for each one at the end of the paragraph. The scores will be from 1-10, 10 obviously meaning pure roller coastergasm perfection. I LOVE amusement parks, I've been to Disney World, Universal Studios, Islands of Adventure (twice), SeaWorld, & Six Flags Great America (4-5 times) in the past year. I'm a roller coaster junkie, I never met a drop I didn't love. Heights are a plus for me, the higher the better. I really want to go on a cross country trip to ride all the greatest roller coasters, that would be a dream of mine that I one day hope to fulfill. Until then, 30 roller coasters, past & present, ranked up to my all-time favorite, let's go...

30 - Ragin' Cajun
Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

I'm admittedly not a huge fan of this particular ride, I've ridden it only a handful of times and it was never a very thrilling experience to be honest. This is a crazy mouse ride that opened up in 2004 at Six Flags Great America. It's a small track that has a circular car spinning randomly throughout the ride. It's a fun ride to be with friends on (for the love of God do not put the big person in the middle of 3 people unless you want to get squished as fuck) the shifting of the weight is very prominent during the spins. Personally, I skip this ride every time I go to Six Flags Great America now.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 4/10

29 - Spacely's Sprocket Rockets
Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

This may be the most terrifying ride on this list. This ride will make you scream, it will make you cry, it will...okay it's a kiddie ride. Don't you dare try to tell me it doesn't deserve to be on a roller coaster list, this ride was the shit when I was 10. My mom & I loved to go on this ride when I was a kid and it opened in 1998 at Six Flags Great America. I have a picture of my mom & I doing the Home Alone Macaulay Culkin screaming look and it certifies that my mom & I are awesome. I may never ride this ride again, but I can appreciate it for what it was when I was a child.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 5/10

28 - Iron Wolf
Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

Iron Wolf was a stand-up roller coaster in Six Flags Great America that opened in 1990. I rode it several times and it's an okay ride that is a bitch of a bitch on the head. Was very rough and wasn't all too comfortable to stand for the guys, the balls took a beating on this ride. It was my mom's favorite ride and she's pretty disappointed that early this month, they began dismantling the ride as it will now operate as Apocalypse in Six Flags America in Maryland. It was a great coaster in its inception in the beginning of the 90s, but it did not age well at all. Still, I'll miss walking by it in Great America, will be weird to not see it there anymore.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 5.5/10

27 - The Beast
Kings Island (Mason, Ohio)

This thing is MASSIVE. The Beast is the world's longest wooden roller coaster and it stretches over 35 acres of land. It's a marvel to look at and a thrill to ride. I love roller coasters that use tunnels and scenery to
incorporate during the ride and The Beast uses them very well. My favorite part of this ride is the fact that there are TWO big hills, which is my favorite part of any roller coaster. That long drawn out process of going up the hill and hearing the chains pulling you up is thrilling. It's not a particularly intense ride, but it is damn impressive to go through the entire track and definitely worth a ride if you ever find yourself in Kings Island.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 6/10

26 - Matterhorn Bobsleds

Disneyland (Anaheim, California)

I remember back in 2000, when my family & I went to Disneyland in California, we reached a fork in the road for our trip. We had to decide if we wanted to ride the Matterhorn Bobsleds or go see the parade that was starting in 20 minutes. I, as an excited 9 year old in Disneyland, wanted to do both. We ultimately decided to ride the Matterhorn Bobsleds. While waiting in line I walked over to a nearby fountain and took a penny from my pocket and tossed it in while making a wish that we could ride the Matterhorn and see the parade as well. Sure enough, when I walked back in line, we sped through it in no time. There was no point in line where it wasn't walking forward and we got to ride the Matterhorn and made it in time for the parade. Sure it's a corny story, but I'll always remember the pure happiness I felt as a kid, one of my favorite memories ever. The ride itself is awesome, I rode on the Tomorrowland side (there is a second track with an entrance located in Fantasyland) Fun fact: there is a very tiny basketball court at the top of the mountain.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 6.5/10

25 - Vertical Velocity

Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

This is one of those rides that I've only been on a handful of times, but it's a hell of a ride. Reaching speeds of 70 MPH, Vertical Velocity opened at Six Flags Great America in 2001. The ride initially ran with a braking system on the rear tower, which would lock the ride while staring directly down at the ground. The braking system is currently broken, which sucks because it adds a lot to the ride to be locked in place for that momentary period of time. The reason I don't go on this ride much more is because the line takes forever to go through. Due to the track layout, there only is one train going at a time, so it's a hell of a wait for a hell of a ride.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 6.5/10

24 - Invertigo
Kings Island (Mason, Ohio)

Invertigo freaked me out when I was a kid going to Kings Island but I still jumped on it. It's a lot like the ride Déjà Vu which used to be in Six Flags Great America that I was never able to ride, so I'll always be able to hang my hat on the fact that I was able to go on this years ago. It's a unique ride that sends you through a series of loops & corkscrews. It can get pretty discombobulating but it's a hell of a lot of fun. I would definitely go on this again if I had the chance.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 6.5/10

23 - California Screamin'

Disneyland (Anaheim, California)

When someone mentions Disneyland, I immediately think of California Screamin'. This ride is phenomenal and extremely unique. The fact that it's a Disney roller coaster is one thing, considering Disney not at all known for roller coasters, but the initial launch of this roller coaster is epic. Rather than simply going up a hill, this ride launches you from 0-55 MPH in 4 seconds up the hill. The tunnels placed throughout the track make it all that more unique and the fact that it's a steel roller coaster made to look wooden; just adds to the novelty of this wonderful ride.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7/10

22 - Big Thunder Mountain Railroad
Walt Disney World (Orlando, Florida)

This is one of those rides that when you're watching from afar or on a Youtube video, you're not very impressed. It has one wonderful thing going for it and it's that Disney created it. Disney does a magnificent job at theming their rides and Thunder Mountain is no different. The area you go racing through on the train is detailed and fun to take in. The ride itself is nothing to write home about, but the experience is fun as hell.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7/10

21 - Space Mountain

Walt Disney World (Orlando, Florida)

Yet another example of Disney doing an immaculate job at theming their rides. Space Mountain is an in-door roller coaster that is pretty impressive to go racing through. All the background noises and lights flashing before your eyes really add to the experience of the ride. Two stigmas will forever remain for this ride with me, even though it's pretty awesome. One, the line was massive. Most lines in Disney World are huge, but this one was insultingly long. Also, this ride lifted me off my ass quite a few times and I'd smack back down on the seat and my balls began to hurt quite a bit. OTHER THAN THAT...this ride is pretty fantastic.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7/10

20 - Shock Wave

Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois

This ride remains as one of the gnarliest rides I have ever conquered. The G-forces and loops mixed in with the speed made this ride intense as hell. Unfortunately, this ride was taken down by Six Flags Great America in 2002. The ride wasn't all too popular when it was dismantled, but God damn was it ever the bee's knees when it was opened. The fact that there's even a Youtube video of it is amazing to me.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7.5/10

19 - Dragon Challenge
Islands of Adventure (Orlando, Florida)

The layout of this ride is absolutely ridiculous. Two inverted cars going at the same time, in unison. There are several moments in the ride where you literally come a mere couple feet away from the opposing riders. This ride is in the new Wizarding World of Harry Potter in Universal's Islands of Adventure and is themed to match the Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire story. Universal does a phenomenal job of theming the park and the Harry Potter incorporation to this ride was seamless. One of the unheralded gems of the new Harry Potter park.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7.5/10

18 - Demon
Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

Demon is one of those rides at Six Flags Great America that has been around forever but remains as a park staple. It's also one of those rides that you forget how badass it is until you ride it again. I'll go long stretches in my life without challenging the Demon, but every time I go back on it, I ponder to myself why is it that I don't go on it more. There'a almost never any sort of substantial line for it and it packs a punch. It's a perfect graduating ride for the youngins in the park to challenge so they know they're ready for the big kahunas of the park.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7.5/10

17 - Magnum XL-200
Cedar Point (Sandusky, Ohio)

This ride is so badass that my family bought a magnet of its logo to display on the refrigerator that still hangs today. So chyeah, now you fully understand the epicness of this ride. It's part of the insane collection of rides at Cedar Point, a place in which I would kill to go back to now. I really don't think I appreciated the amazingness of Cedar Point as a child, I need to go back so I can really entrance myself into the epic rides, such as Magnum XL-200.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7.5/10

16 - Viper

Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

As a little whipper snapper, Viper was my favorite ride to go on at Six Flags Great America. I love the brown wood and the impressive layout/structure. It may not be my favorite now that I'm an older whipper snapper, but it'll always have a place in my heart. For some reason, with Viper, I am able to recall the welcome audio they play each time the trains open up for a new crowd.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7.5/10

15 - Whizzer

Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

Whizzer is truly a one of a kind roller coaster located in Six Flags Great America. It's fitting for both the little kiddies and adults alike. Racing through the forest of trees is exhilarating and the lift up the twirling tower is one of my favorite roller coaster experiences ever. Fun fact: I am very much able to reach up and grab leaves off the trees as the train rides by. An act that I perform that will surely cost me an arm in the future.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7.5/10

14 - Millennium Force

Cedar Point (Sandusky, Ohio)

This is one of those rides that when you walk up to it and see its drop and layout you basically can't say anything other than "OHHHHHH-HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLYYYYY SHIT." I was chilled to the bone as a little scallywag as I approached this ride. 300+ foot drop is nothing to mess around with. I told you Cedar Point had some gnarly rides.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7.5/10

13 - Superman: Ultimate Flight

Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

I love innovative roller coasters. That's exactly what Superman: Ultimate Flight in Six Flags Great America is. The fact that once you're locked into this ride, they take your feet off the ground and move you so your chest is to the ground is amazing. The inverted loop on this ride where you're left staring up at the sky is absurd. It still manages to throw me through a...loop...dat pun...every time.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 7.5/10

12 - Son of Beast

Kings Island (Mason, Ohio)

This ride...this...fucking ride. Holy shit I still get chills just thinking about this colossal God of a ride. Where should I start? Let's see, it's over 7,000 feet of wooden track, got a drop of 214 feet, and reaches a speed of 78 MPH. Oh yeah, IT'S GOT A FUCKING LOOP. Words cannot describe how amazed and speechless I was at the prospect of a wooden roller coaster having a loop. This is another ride that has a magnet on the refrigerator in the house and I would give anything to go on it again. Unfortunately, even if I did return to Kings Island, I wouldn't be able to ride this amazing ride. The ride has been shut down for the past 2 years, not to mention the impressive loop was taken out several years back due to stress on the ride. I honestly consider myself extremely lucky to have been able to ride this ride. My favorite ride of our Ohio trip years back.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 8/10

11 - The Dark Knight

Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

When The Dark Knight roller coaster was opened in Six Flags Great America in 2008, it was met with much fanfare and then ultimately disappointment. The ride coincided with the release of the insanely popular movie The Dark Knight and many people loved the idea of a ride being themed after it. Many people expected a thrilling and exciting indoor roller coaster...unfortunately The Dark Knight has been criticized as nothing more than a tame kiddie ride. I, on the other hand, appreciate the ride for what it is. It's fun, fast-paced, & excellently themed. I have no problem riding this ride over and over again, the experience of flying through a dark room is something I love.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 8/10

10 - American Eagle
Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

American Eagle in Six Flags Great America is definitely one of those rides that I haven't appreciated enough in my life. There have been so many trips to Six Flags Great America where I & my friends just decided to skip out on the 147 foot drop, that doesn't happen anymore. The massive wooden structure is damn impressive and the first drop is exhilarating. The racing aspect of the ride makes it fun and when the blue train goes backwards, it puts an innovative touch to a classic ride.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 8/10

9 - Manta
SeaWorld (Orlando, Florida)

This ride, Manta in SeaWorld, has the same concept as Superman: Ultimate Flight, but does it much better. The ride is smooth as you go flying around an area surrounded by water and fountains, it's pretty magical. It's a damn impressive ride just to watch a video of and it really surprised me how much I loved this ride. I was also pleasantly surprised to see SeaWorld had some pretty kick-ass rides. You'll see another one in a couple seconds...
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 8/10

8 - Kraken
SeaWorld (Orlando, Florida)

There are so many aspects of this ride that I adore. The massive drop is great, the fact that there is just a seat and no floor for your feet is terrifying, and all the loops are crazy. This ride really has everything. The fact that his ride manages to twist and flip you AS YOU'RE GOING UP A HILL, is just a testament to how fantastic it is. I remember when I went to SeaWorld, you could see this ride from right outside our resort, I knew from day one it was a ride that I was going to need to jump on. I'd do anything to get on this ride again.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 8.5/10

7 - Batman: The Ride
Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

There are so many inverted roller coaster in this world, but Batman: The Ride can make the claim as the FIRST one ever. It opened in the early 90s at Six Flags Great America and has been a staple of the park ever since. The intense speeds are like heroin for a roller coaster junkie. It's a very short ride just because it's not huge and it's insanely fast, which is awesome because that line moves pretty fast. Speaking of which, the line themed out with Batman stuff and the music of it all makes it one of my favorite lines ever.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 8.5/10

6 - Incredible Hulk Coaster
Islands of Adventure (Orlando, Florida)

The Incredible Hulk Coaster is one of those impressive structures in Islands of Adventure that you just can't NOT go on. The opening of this ride is the most intense thing I've ever ridden. You're slowly getting risen up a hill in a tunnel and you hear Bruce Banner slowly turning into the Hulk and then BIGGITY BAM, you're getting shot into the mist and out of the tunnel and before you know it you're in an intricate green jungle of corkscrews and loops.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 9/10

5 - Revenge of the Mummy: The Ride

Universal Studios (Orlando, Florida)

This is the best combination of theme and ride that I have ever had the pleasure of enjoying, bar none. Just when you think this ride is finished, nope you're going for more. You go down little hills, go at blazing speeds, pass up images of mummies attacking you, fire blazing all around you, ride backwards to get away from bugs, and then go through a bunch of hills in a pitch black room as you try to escape the mummy who just killed the ride conductor. Seriously, this ride has so much going for it and you just have to appreciate all the work the engineers who made this ride put into it. Truly epic.
Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 9/10

4 - Expedition Everest

Walt Disney World (Orlando, Florida)

Yet another ride that does more than just the standard, pick you up and hill and drop you structure. You go backwards in this ride because at one point, the Yeti who is trying to attack you destroyed a part of the track. Then as you go racing through a cave you're confronted with the behemoth of a monster and it's a race to try and get away from him. The excellent theming and just the ride itself makes it what it is. An amazing roller coaster from a company (Disney) that isn't known for roller coasters.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 9/10

3 - Rock 'n' Roller Coaster

Walt Disney World (Orlando, Florida)

There is nothing I can say about this ride to match its amazing epicness. The ride starts off with a pre-show having AeroSmith invite you to their show and you should meet them in the alley to get into the limo. You walk into this back alley themed area and a long stretch limo, which acts as your roller coaster seat. Then you can get taken to a stop light and the countdown begins. Before you know it you're being shot into a pitch black room filled with neon road signs as you race to the AeroSmith show, with AeroSmith playing in the speakers by your head. It's so damn intense and a fuck of a lot of fun. Gotta love Disney, the company not known for roller coasters has 2 of the top 4 favorites of mine.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 9/10

2 - Hollywood Rip Ride Rockit

Universal Studios (Orlando, Florida)

This is one word I would use to describe this ride. Innovative. You go flying around a beautiful track of drops, with music YOU chose playing in your ears. There are hundreds of songs to choose from (provided you know about the secret code to punch in a song, rather than just listen to the ones they initially provide for you) When I rode this, I decided on listening to Bring Me to Life by Evanescence. The song itself is fine, but mixed in with a kick-ass roller coaster, it was a fantastic combination. When I went to Orlando in April, we'd take a boat into the Universal area and I would see this ride every morning, when I finally got to ride it, it was nothing short of spectacular.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 9/10

1 - Raging Bull

Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)

Raging Bull opened in Six Flags Great America in the mid to late 90s and still remains as the undisputed best and most popular ride in the park. The unbelievable 70+ MPH speeds and 200+ foot drop make this a must-ride for anyone in Six Flags Great America. The fact that the lift to get to the top of the ride is more than a minute long is astonishing. The mini drop at the top where you fall a foot a two into the massive drop is enough to make you spit your stomach out. The mini drops that follow the massive drop are still higher than those of Bull's next door neighbor, Viper. It's a damn impressive structure to behold and absolutely my favorite ride of all-time.

Michael Ryne's Awesomeness Score - 9.5/10

BONUS!!!
Now then, as I already stated, I've only been on 30 roller coasters so a top 30 list was all I could conjure up. I do however, want to pay tribute to some non-roller coaster rides that are just as epic to me as all these roller coasters.

Giant Drop
Six Flags Great America (Gurnee, Illinois)